9 years

I leave for Korea today. It hasn't hit me yet.
It's been 9 years. 9 years of learning a new language and culture, trying to blend in and hide my own culture at one point. It's funny because I am more familiar with American culture and Alphabets now.
I don't know if I'm gonna tear up when I land in Korea. A half of my life was spent there yet I don't remember it all that much. I just know that 9 years ago, my life, my brother's, and my parents' lives were forever changed. It's weird looking back. I was in 4th grade, so eager to move to the U.S... I don't quite remember why -- I think my mom just asked me if I wanted to and I said yea without thinking all that much. I always liked visiting my grandparents in the U.S. so I think that's maybe why I wanted to move here. First few years in the U.S. were actually not all that difficult for me other than worrying about my parents constantly. It's after those years that I realized how much effort I put in to do well at school and be independent. I still remember the first day at school in March of my 4th grade year. During art time, everyone drew lines and shapes with a pencil, so I, having no idea what our teacher told us to draw, just drew bunch of lines and shapes as well. I still have no idea what we were supposed to draw. And ugh, I don't even know why I picked the name Rachel. I couldn't even pronounce it at first. It's weird because I immediately respond whenever someone calls out Rachel, but my name could have been Stephanie, Tina, Jennifer, or Jessica.
Enough rambling. I should probably take a nap (haha..) before I leave to the airport at 4am.
I can't believe I'm actually going.