Saturday, June 14, 2014

What I learned past six years

Dear brother,

The moment you enter middle school, your life will change. It was past six years that had a significant impact on my life. It was these six years that shaped me and made me who I am today. Believe it or not, you will dramatically change over the years even if you don't notice it, but I promise you, when you look back after these six years (seven years for you), you will be surprised at how much you've matured and changed for the better, hopefully. I know, I'm making it sound like middle school and high school are the most important time of your life. It will be, but it also will not be.

I thought these years were the longest time of my life. Looking back at them now, they were nothing. They were only a fraction of my (hopefully long) existence. I have these great numbers of years of future ahead of me, multiples of middle school and high school years combined -- silly of me, I thought I wouldn't even make it this far. What I'm trying to tell you is that you'll feel like these seven years ahead of you will determine your entire life and permanently change your path in life. You'll feel like the world only revolves around these adolescent years. I'm here to tell you that no, middle school and high school will not do anything to how you want your life to be like in the future. They are nothing.

In middle school, I wanted to fit in. I wanted to be like everyone else; I wanted to escape from my immigrant identity. In high school, I spent countless days crying at night because of stress, pressure, college, insecurity, and that god damn perfectionism. Yeah, school is important, and you do need to keep your grades up and do well on your standardized tests if you want to go to college and achieve your goals. But please have fun. Find the balance between studying and social life. For college, it doesn't matter if you do or don't get into Harvard. Getting into Harvard doesn't mean you are a better person. Just do your best. I mean it, do your best at everything. Be the most resilient person, not smart, and follow your dream. I didn't say "be" the best at everything though -- this will only lead you to depression. I made a mistake wanting to be perfect at everything, and as you kind of know, it ruined me. Please don't make that mistake. Please don't. Try your hardest and do your best. You don't have to try to be perfect because you already are. And when mom compares you to other kids, ignore her or tell her to her face that what she's doing is disrespectful and that that also ruined your sister and maybe she'll stop. Don't take her criticisms to your heart, because you are fabulous.

I made a mistake thinking that these years were all there was to life. They were only six years.
These years will not dramatically your life but you yourself.
Enjoy every single day of your middle school and high school years, make good friends, try your hardest, have fun, and tell me that you've had the best seven years of your life at your graduation.

And remember, mom, dad, and I love you no matter what.

Love,
Your big sister